STORIES
288 - That’s a Cat
2021
Jesse Racolo Neve Quinn Tahariel
Saturday morning in the kitchen …
JESSE:
Are you humming?
RACOLO:
Me? No.
JESSE:
Yes you were. I heard you.
RACOLO:
You’re nuts.
NEVE:
No he not. ‘Colo you was humming. I heard you.
That means you happy.
JESSE:
Oh yeah - the big date last night. I guess you and Es
had a real good time.
RACOLO:
Something like that. I gotta go …
JESSE:
What’s the hurry?
RACOLO:
We’re taking Lith to the petting zoo this morning.
NEVE:
Oh Jesse!
JESSE:
No - just finish your cereal and sit back down before you fall.
NEVE:
Oh please! I love the petting zoo …
JESSE:
Great - look what you started.
RACOLO:
Hey, you asked.
NEVE:
But Jesse you have to take me, you my big brother …
JESSE:
I said no.
NEVE:
Oh please? Pretty please. Pretty pretty pretty please …
JESSE:
There’s no way I’m taking you to the freakin’ petting zoo
so knock it off.
Later in the living room …
NEVE:
Hey Quinn. I went to the petting zoo. I saw goats
and sheep and a little pony …
QUINN:
Did ya now?
JESSE:
Neve - you made me buy you this thing and
then you left it in the car.
NEVE:
My sheep! Look Quinn, I got a sheep.
QUINN:
Aye that’s gr-date.
QUINN:
Jesse ya did all that for yer wee sis, I’m impressed.
NEVE:
I wanted to stay more but Jesse said he’d buy me this if we could go.
QUINN:
Did he now? I take it all back then. So you went and bribed her, eh?
JESSE:
Oh shut up.
NEVE:
I gonna go show my sheep to Grace now. Jesse you be nice to Quinn.
JESSE:
Yeah yeah.
JESSE:
… Three friggin’ hours in a petting zoo. What a waste of
a Saturday. Can you smell that? I think I got goat on me.
- ? -
JESSE:
Hey, that’s a cat
QUINN:
Aye, it is.
JESSE:
But we don’t have a cat.
QUINN:
Do now. That’s Albert.
JESSE:
Albert? Albert. What a stupid name for a cat.
Who’s the idiot that named him that?
TAHARIEL:
I did. I guess you’d have gone with Kitty
or Tiger or something else far less original.
TAHARIEL:
… Well, I’ll have you know he’s named after
Albert Einstein, the greatest theoretical physicist
of all time. Maybe you’ve heard of him? Probably not.
TAHARIEL:
… C’mon Albert. Let’s get you out of here …
TAHARIEL:
… What a jerk.
JESSE:
Who the hell was that?
QUINN:
Tahariel. Go on, make fun of her name too why doncha?
JESSE:
Man did you see her? She is so hot …
QUINN:
Forget it, ya donnae stand a chance with her.
JESSE:
Oh yeah, well you don’t know what you’re talking about.
QUINN:
I know ya just insulted her cat. Neva insult a lass’s pet mate,
especially her’s.
JESSE:
Right, and I guess you know all about her.
QUINN:
I should, she’s ma niece - and I’ll thank ya to keep yer
bleedin’ hands off her or you’ll answer to me.
